I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the way in which we communicate with each other, especially over social media, and even more particularly, whenever we’re in disagreement. A modern example of this is regarding the recent #HeGetsUs campaign which aired over Superbowl 57. There was much controversy among the Church, and I believe it was mainly because of the lack of representation of Jesus’ deity within the campaign. The Scriptures, being God’s communication to man, display a lot of attributes of proper communication. They also directly speak to the issue in multiple places. How ought we communicate with each other? Below is a list of strongly suggested (by me) rules of communication.
- Communicate for the benefit of the other (with the goal of love)
Paul, communicating with Timothy, states the specific goal of “our instruction;” namely, love.[1] This love is what we are striving for in our instruction, but even more broadly, our communication. Now, “love” here is the Greek word agape, which is most simply defined as the care for the other, an affection and desire for the well-being of another. This is often referred to as sacrificial love which is displayed most clearly in Jesus Christ’s death on a cross. The Creator died at the hands of His creation for His creation. We are to communicate with this same attitude. This does not always take on an appearance of a sweet tone but does always have the good of the other in mind.
- Communicate with the goal of instruction
One point that is implied in the previous rule is that our communication often ought to be motivated by instruction, or communication which informs the other specifically about the truths of the Biblical worldview. It’s a stretch to say we should always be instructing someone, but much communication should be motivated by the others transforming growth toward the image of Christ[2].
- Communicate precisely
When communicating, realize that words have meaning in various contexts and those agreed upon definitions should be intended whenever using language. This is a process I’ve been trying to improve in my own communication. Words have meaning and should be wielded appropriately. This also applies to grammatical and syntactical structure, word construction, and others. For example, Paul appeals to this whenever discussing the “seed of Abraham” referring to Jesus Christ. The singularity of “seed” is appealed to in Galatians 3:16. The word was used precisely and shows that God was referring to one, not many.
- Communicate clearly
This one might seem obvious, but clarity is not easy to achieve and takes much effort. This is commonly discussed among marriages. While clear communication isn’t always received and interpreted correctly, it is important that we try to minimize error in our communication. God does not always communicate with clarity[3] but any ambiguity or obscurity is purposeful[4]. In the vast majority of cases, God communicates clearly with the goal of the audience understanding Him[5].
- Communicate fairly
In other words, stop building strawmen arguments so you can burn them to the ground. This is incredibly popular among theologians with opposing views, yet not only is it unfruitful but is deceitful and untrue. The strawman is an absolute misrepresentation of the other’s view. Not once, in Jesus’ interactions with the Pharisees do we see Jesus building a strawman argument against them. He was informed (being God and all…) and communicated based on that truth. He confronted them whenever necessary but did so in a fair manner, exposing their unrighteousness[6].
- Communicate truthfully
Communicate those things which are based on reality. Jesus claims to be the truth[7], claims God’s word is truth[8], and describes the importance of truth[9]. We should characterize our communication as truthful. It would seem it is best, if one doesn’t know whether something is true or not, to either refrain from expressing the communication or explain the ignorance before communicating the desired information.
- Communicate once informed
Jesus is about to be crucified. He is being tried before Pontius Pilate. The Jews who are bringing Jesus to be crucified claim Jesus has committed blasphemy (only problem is, Jesus is God). Before making a decision regarding Jesus’ execution, Pilate calls Jesus into the Praetorium and begins a line of questioning. Jesus, being informed, answers the questions, fulfilling multiple prophecies. Jesus is informed and answers Pilate’s questions accordingly.
Another classic example of this is found in Ezra 7:10. Admittedly, it’s a descriptive model, but a seemingly solid one. Ezra 7:10 states, “For Ezra had set his heart to study the law of the LORD and to practice it, and to teach His statutes and ordinances in Israel.” Notice, Ezra first studied, then practiced, and then taught. Ezra was well informed whenever communicating with the recovering nation of Israel.
- Communicate to be informed
Going back to Jesus and Pilate’s conversation, note that Pilate characterized his communication with questions. He genuinely wanted to know the answers to his questions as he was literally making a life-or-death decision for Jesus. Paul, in Acts 17, observes his surroundings before communicating with those in Athens as he wanted to be informed before communicating.
This most often is done by asking questions, and then genuinely listening to the answers. Often, we communicate without having a desire of being informed. So, we either don’t ask questions, or we ask questions with a pre-committed response to the assumed answer. If this is the case, we are communicating with potentially false information.
- Communicate sternly only when necessary
Jesus’ interaction with others throughout the gospels are fascinating. As He interacts with the woman at the well, or the Canaanite woman, or His disciples, or the religious leaders of the day, He most often takes a soft tone. I think of Proverbs 15:1, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.” However, at times, Jesus clearly communicated sternly. Most often, He communicated this way with the religious leaders of the day due to their hypocrisy and willful neglect of the Scriptures.[10]
- Sometimes, don’t communicate
This is an interesting one, and hard to prove Biblically as the description would by nature be an argument from silence, but I think it’s an important one. For many reasons, sometimes it’s best to simply stay quiet. Basically, do a pros and cons list regarding your communication and decide whether you ought to communicate or not. Can you communicate in an edifying way? Are you informed? Do you have anything fruitful to contribute? The list goes on… Sometimes, we just need to shut our mouths.
Remember, like in all things, our goal is to glorify God. “Whether, then, you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”[11]
[1] 1 Timothy 1:5
[2] Matthew 28:18-20; Romans 12:1-2
[3] Daniel 12:9; Matthew 13:10-17
[4] ibid
[5] Cf. Genesis 2:16-17 and Genesis 3:3
[6] Cf. John 5:18-47
[7] John 14:6
[8] John 17:17
[9] John 8:31-59
[10] Cf. Matthew 23:13-36
[11] 1 Corinthians 10:31
