DINKS, Selfishness, and Parenthood

In recent weeks, there has been a trend making its way through social media. Individuals are making videos where they reveal reasons why they are voluntarily childless and call themselves DINKS. DINKS is an acronym which stands for Dual Income No Kids. There are a few variations such as SINKS (Single Income No Kids). Some examples of the reasons for choosing not to have children vary from being able to buy their owns snacks from the store, travel whenever they want, sleeping in, and much more. Just search DINKS in the social media platform of your choosing and you’ll find some examples. There is quite the variety of reasons, but as I listened, something struck me – all the reasons I heard were materialistic, or at least self-serving. Here’s an example:

Before diving in, it’s worth noting: Having children is not the grand-sum meaning of life. We weren’t created for simply having children. In fact, Paul states in 1 Corinthians 7:8, “But I say to the unmarried and to widows that it is good for them if they remain even as I.” Paul is in discussion regarding sexual purity and a purpose of marriage (among many or purposes). It can be easily understood that Paul’s theology regarding having children requires marriage. So, if he is stating that singleness is acceptable for those whom God has blessed the ability to do so, then he must also conclude it is acceptable for those same individuals to go without having children.

It is also worth noting, I understand not everyone can have children. My heart breaks for that person and I pray that God would be gracious, blessing them tremendously with strength, hope, and happiness. This article, and the trend it is addressing, is regarding those who are voluntarily going without having any kids for the sake of self.

That being said, the DINKS trend is one of the worst I’ve seen in recent days and here’s a few (among many) reasons why:

God has given humanity the imperative to be fruitful and multiply

After God created mankind, he commanded Adam and Eve to “be fruitful and multiply.[1]” After the fall of mankind, this imperative did not end for it is repeated after the flood as well on multiple occasions.[2] There isn’t specifics given regarding quantity or longevity. It’s simply given as something Noah and his descendants were to do so they could “populate the earth abundantly and multiply in it.”

Multiplying one’s family line is seen as a blessing

Throughout the Scriptures, God blesses individuals by multiplying their descendants. Probably the most foundational blessing of all the Scriptures involves God blessing Abraham, giving him descendants “as the stars of the heavens and as the sand which is on the seashore…”[3]

Children are a gift of the Lord

Solomon writes in Psalm 127:3-5, “Behold, children are a gift of the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them…”

The trend presents the state of self-servidness prevalent within society

There is no denying the Bible provides ample evidence for the wickedness of selfishness, but James makes probably the harshest statement against it, “For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing.”[4] Ironically, the context for this passage is the importance of seeking wisdom from the Lord. In contrast to the wisdom from the Lord, James describes a wicked wisdom which is “earthly, natural, demonic.” The characteristics of this earthly wisdom are jealousy and selfish ambition.

Again, is it a requirement that all people are to get married and have children? No. However, the DINKS trend is not advocating for making a few exceptions to the norm,[5] but instead encouraging an entire society to focus on themselves, their own pleasures, leading to a narcissistic lifestyle which is anti-Biblical.

[1] Genesis 1:28

[2] Genesis 8:17; 9:1, 7

[3] Genesis 22:17

[4] James 3:16

[5] Genesis 1:28; 2:24-25